Babby Shii-tan
by DeathhunterAshi
Summary: After failing his personal mission for the 100th time, Counter Guardian EMIYA decides to choose a more..."hands on" way to change Shirou's ideals as he won't die even when killed. (Contains Infantilism)
1. Assessing the Problem

Ashi: I have nothing to say. I'm kinkshaming (aka venting fustrations) myself. This is the result of many, many fanfics read over the week featuring...Adult Babies and this came to mind.

God I need sleep.

Xx-Determination-xX

Chapter 1 - Realizing the Problem: by Counter Guardian EMIYA (AKA Archer)

If it wasn't for the fact that his eternity was taken by Alaya and forced into being a Counter Guardian, EMIYA would question most of his decisions- save for the ones involving causing a paradox so strong it erases both his and his past self's existence. Somewhere along the 100th time did he realize that this wasn't working and that a new plan was at hand.

Become his Servant instead of Rin's - Gets killed due to betrayal

Fuse together into one entity - Ends in a harem of yandere-esce females

Use Rule Breaker on Lancer - Ends with his past self getting "frisky" with Ireland's Child of Light (and forced to record it no thanks to Rin and Sakura)

Fix his faulty circuits - Ends up summoning an entire army of Sabers and still winds up in a harem, but with added men

So deciding to make this the final 101st time, EMIYA found himself being summoned a lot earlier than usual. He noted that he fell into the living room like last time he was summoned on the 23rd time (he didn't dare speak of Kotomine) and Rin coming up and yelling at him, demanding him to clean said room, and somehow managed to avoid losing that very important first command seal. Later the next day he would find himself hunting down Lancer and forcing him into a contract with Rin and using Rule Breaker on himself (viva la Independent Action Attribute) and heading back to where his old home was.

This part, made a deep, dark part of him react negatively- saying that it was change his ideals or absolutely murder his past self ; in the end, EMIYA found himself ignoring it and sneaking into the mansion undisturbed.

This was where it got hard.

It was the matter of setting every single thing up as a trap, preventing Taiga from coming in and disturbing everything (forging a letter saying she had to go to Namimori for the next few days to train a no good middle school student) and kidnapping Sakura in order to leave her with Rin, debatable, but effective. Next was locking the Shed preventing his past self both from training and accidentally summoning Saber, who would make the entire transition even more difficult. With those parts done came the most difficult waiting game to happen: waiting for Shirou Emiya to come home.

As soon as the clock hit five, Archer called the school explaining that Shirou will be going on a family trip to England for the next two weeks as to not hold onto any suspicion, introducing himself as his Uncle. As he would be helping out the student council and the heading to Copenhagen for the next five hours, this gave time for him to start changing the room. Moving all sharp objects and books to another room down the hall along human/magi-proofing everything, he made the room more comfortable and child-like; adding a playpen in the living room with a few toys (ironically, a plush Lancer Alter and plastic versions of Kanshou and Byakuya). All the blue and white baseball shirts, pants, and school uniforms placed in the storage room and replaced with more comfortable and age-appropriate clothing, items, and "underwear" in the dresser. Removing his holy shroud and battle outfit, Archer instead put on a black collar shirt and pants to match, rolling up the sleeves, huffing at little at everything.

This was his last try to fix his mistakes of the previous timelines, to finally rest in peace not as a Hero or a Counter Guardian, but just as regular ol' EMIYA. Even if it wasn't the most...sane.


	2. Becoming the Problem

Ashi: As of now, this is a series. Enjoy!

Warning: Cursing and Teen Baby Shirou

Xx-Determination-xX

Chapter 2- Becoming the Problem: By Second Year Homurahara High Student Shirou Emiya

A part of him knew that something wrong was going to happen today, feelings like that coming a mile a dozen once every few months- like when finding out Issei was almost beaten up by a group of thugs (never has he been put wrong when seeing his friend a bit scuffed up and putting his glasses on like nothing ever happened- all the aforementioned thugs on the ground gasping for breath and groaning from broken bones) or Tohsaka-san nearly getting hit by a soccer ball (well it did happen and promptly got his ass kicked for accidentally being the one who kicked it at her). But the reason he felt like this started when he saw Tohsaka walking through the hallways with a violent expression on her face, one that even managed to send Issei reeling away from her. Strange mutterings of 'that damn Archer' and 'who does he think he is sending another Servant after breaking their contract'. None of it really made sense and the offer to ask her for tea in the Student Council room seemed a lot more dangerous.

The second came in the form of receiving more homework from all the teachers, apparently getting a call saying that his 'Uncle' said he was going on a family trip to England for the next two weeks. Considering that, he was pretty sure one of the Fujimuras would warn him about a trip prior-although Fuji-nee seemed to be really panicked and not willing to talk while packing up everything and hiring a substitute English teacher and freaking out about how 'Reborn-san was going to kill her and Sawada with this training'.

Then the third and final one came with getting extra vacation time from his boss at Copenhagen after learning of his vacation and a extra tip telling him to 'have fun'. By then that feeling had deepened to something akin to both worry and sickness, wondering who managed to convince everyone Shirou knew into thinking he was going to England without him knowing. It seemed to increase on his way back to Shinto, gripping the straps of his bookbag a bit tighter and staying aware of his surroundings. By the time he got to the Emiya household, he had calmed down a bit and unlocked the door, with a little difficulty.

"...huh? Did the key get damaged somehow? I should probably check that out later. " He muttered, removing his shoes and walking into the living room.

But before Shirou could even turn on the lights, a sharp pain made its way through the back of his neck- causing him to black out.

When he woke up again, he felt sluggish and lax, as if someone had drugged him with the intended purpose of knocking him out...when really thinking about it was probably true. A soft lullaby was playing in the room, one that he hadn't heard since Kiritsugu's passing along with a soft blue blanket over him. The comfort of it all quickly began lulling the redhead back into a fitful sleep that reminded him of when he was younger, before he wanted to become a Magus like the old man and just learn how to be 'human' again. A soft cooing noise fought its way up his throat and out, his eyes drooping even more so before a soft snore made its way out.

As he finally went back to sleep, a dark figure stood near the sliding doors with their arms crossed, watching silently while narrowing their eyes.

Step 1 has been finished and now- now was time for the second phase.


	3. Addressing the Problem

Ashi: And well, here we go! Eh heh heh...

Xx-Determination-xX

Chapter 3 - Addressing the Problem by Second Year Homurahara High Student Shirou Emiya

As the sun slowly rose to meet the new day, so did Shirou while noticing that the lullaby was no longer playing-turned off most likely during the night. His eyes came into focus a little lazily from the best night sleep since getting into High School, rolling onto his back and yawning; something soft was right next to him that he found himself unconsciously rubbing his face on it, a happy sigh making a way out of his mouth.

But of course, dreams had to eventually end as a dull ache in the back of his neck made him remember that someone- or something knocked him out. But why did whatever it was drag him back to his room? Suddenly a lot more alert, Shirou got up and looked around, rather disturbed at the state of his room.

The seemed to be more suited for a toddler than a second year in high school, with the walls painted a cool blue along with a changing area and some toys strategically placed. In the crib was Shirou himself and a plushie of a blue haired man with a mask over his eyes and wolf accessories, resting quietly on top of a soft blanket messed up from a night of sleep. The red-haired teen was dressed in a blue onesie decorated with green lines here and there- most prominantly near his right sleeve and left leg. Hands left uncovered, he shifted a little- freezing in both horror and fear with the feeling.

No. No no no, whoever did this did NOT just put him in a diaper.

Contrary to what a lot of people thought, when Shirou was still reeling from losing what made him 'human' and becoming Kiritsugu's child, most of his night terrors were so bad making it to the bathroom on time was a pipe dream to the seven year old back then. So with a lot of reluctance towards the very action from the former Mercenary, he began to dress Shirou in diapers and stayed with him throughout the night- telling him stories of his life although replacing his name with someone else's. It definitely helped with the horrid night terrors along with bringing the father and son together even stronger, even if it was a bit embarrassing at first.

After about two years he was eventually weaned off using diapers until stopping all together, his determination to become a mage coming around strongly at the same time. Now that he was back in them, the memories and embarrassment came forward knowing that his body remembered how it goes and relieving himself unconsciously. Just who the hell was the sick bastard who got off on turning teenagers rooms into a toddler's and dressing them up like one? Glancing at the bars, Shirou made his decision to lift himself out and over, crossing the quick path from crib to closet and opening it-being unanimously startled that ALL his clothes were gone. What replaced it was all baby's clothing made to fit someone with the height of 157 centimeters...his exact height. The only other thing in there was a red and black baseball shirt that was never his favorite and a pair of black pants and a dress shirt.

Without a second thought, he stripped himself of the baby clothes and put on the dark clothes, lamenting at the fact of how big it was on him (he knew it wasn't the old man's, his clothes were neatly placed in a box after his death).

"But how were they able to get through the Bounded Fields in the first place? They react to anyone with negative...intentions." Well there was the problem. Whatever came here had no intention of hurting Shirou so the bells weren't ringing. Rolling up the sleeves and pants, the redhead nodded to himself, going towards the door and opening it- or at least that what was supposed to happen.

Instead the door wouldn't slide at all, almost as if there was a lock on there and trying to pull it with all his might didn't help at all- huffing from the effort and the drug still working its way out of his body. Just what he needed, a muscle relaxant. It was a miracle he was still moving around so easily in the first place. If they just locked the door then that would mean they were still there and this was a small opportunity to use his magecraft to get out. Standing on wobbling legs, Shirou closed his eyes and slowly placed his hand back on the sliding door.

"Trace. On." The feeling of an iron poker going down his spine arches through him while attemping to make a magic circuit- but for some reason as soon as it started, it stopped. Feeling all his energy drained from him, an incomprehensible noise made its way out of his throat as he dropped to the ground a bit roughly.

"What the hell...?" Finally looking down at his hand, he noticed there was a blood red tattoo there that almost looked like a sword in a way and one other conclusive thing. Whatever trapped him here knew he was a Magus and somehow prevented him from using his magecraft.

As if coming when hearing the rather loud thump, the door slid open to reveal his kidnapper (though did that count when you were trapped in your own house?). He looked to be a man of around his late 20s with white hair, silver eyes and tanned skin. But what caught Shirou's eye the most was that he was wearing the same exact outfit he found in the closet. Which meant...

"...What are you doing out of your crib?" Shirou blinked at his voice, expecting anger over his attempted escape and not disappointment for being out in general. He tries to figure out what exactly to say since this situation wasn't normal in the first place, before the man shook his head and swiftly picked him up- earning a startled sqwark from the redhead; being carried over to the changing area, he was tucked into one arm as the other reached for a bag fulled with baby supplies- something that finally spurred him from a delayed reaction.

"Wait wait wait! Stop this! Just who are you in the first place?!" Shirou yelled out, trying to get away from his iron grip. This finally got agitated sigh from the man, who dropped the bag down and gently places Shirou on the changing bed.

"Isn't it obvious from the state of the room and everything else? I'm your caretaker. Or uncle if you prefer." Eh? That...wasn't what he was expecting. The shock kept coming its way until it finally caught up.

"Eh..? WHAT?!"

Xx-Determination-xX

Ashi: Uh, WOW. I got a much more positive response to this series than I expected. That actually makes me feel pretty freaking happy! Especially considering there were times I think I didn't get Shirou and Archer's personalities right. In a way, this is also a strange- slightly demented character development for EMIYA because he's an outright asshole who was willing to give Rin over to Shinji KNOWING THE BULLSHIT HE HAS DONE, backstabbed her and Shirou (in his case literally), and nearly blew everyone in the near area to get killed from using a broken version of Caldabolg. Asshole, thy name is Archer. Also cliff-hanger 'cause suffering.

Now for reviews!

Suzululu4moe: First for both chapters! Thanks for reading! Now I've already made a joke about Attempt #69 being Unlimited Yaoi Works-absolute lenny face- and the infantilism in this series is not ment to be seen in a fetishic way, more like a humorous, familiar way.

Also so badly I want to make or read a fanfic of Taiga training Tsuna to become a Mafia boss since at one point she was trained around the same time Dino was (and is one of the few people who she is actively scared of). Seeing how enthusiastic she is, I headcanon her as a Sun Flame with Sky being a small secondary.

Illya being the true older sister now, so true.

Amatsumi: Dang freaking straight Issei is gonna be a badass. You'd think he'd learn more from living with Kuzuki-sensei.


	4. Childcare 101

Ashi: I don't know how this is popular, but THANK YOU.

Xx-Determination-xX

Chapter 3 - Childcare 101 by Counter Guardian EMIYA (AKA Archer)

The first night was a lot easier than he expected, knocking Shirou out with a dart to the neck and preparing to change him into the clothes brought. Some were of course altered and measured to fit the 5'2" teenager since the website's delivery stated it would take a few weeks for the other items to get there.

Wrinkling his nose, Archer couldn't help but to smell the odor of sweat, metal, and lingering alcohol on Shirou. It would be a waste of laundry to put him in clean clothes while he was still dirty and with that decision, went to pick the redhead up before stopping. In every single timeline, he always manhandled him as if he was a potato sack (save for Attempts #69, 74, and 86) due to wanting to touch as little surface area of his past self as possible- but now that he was raising him...

"A first for everything is what they say. It hasn't even been a whole day and you're already trouble, Shirou Emiya." Shaking his head, Archer picks him up and cradles the sleeping teen with one arm, walking to the bathroom.

Sleeves rolled up and Charge fully naked save for a towel around his waist, Archer lathered up a hand towel and began to gently clean Shirou; lifting up his arms to wash them individually and generally worked his way down meticulously and with great detail. Unawares, Shirou mumbled a bit and attempted to get closer- which of course ended with his shirt getting drenched by the teen. His eye twitched at this, but instead of retaliating rinsed all the soap off and began drying him off with a warm towel. Catching a cold now would be a major pain to deal with in the first day as his 'uncle'. Once out of the bathroom, Archer dressed him in a blue onsie with green lines running across them like a parody of their Tracing Ability and shifted him so that he was carrying the redhead with one arm again as to open the sliding door into the baby room.

As he laid Shirou down and tucked him in, he noted that the younger redhead relaxed as soon as the covers were over him and snuggled into the plushie that was in there. One could say that it was rather...Adorable to look at, as Shirou already had a round face to begin with and a small build. Turning off the lights, a soft lullaby began to play in the room that made the both of them smile at the familiarity of it; Archer took the remaining clothes with him and left the room, sliding the door behind him and depositing them in the washer to be cleaned with the carefully selected laundry.

He noticed that it was already eight as Shirou had come home late from his job and a sense of fatigue came over him from working and planning this all day. He didn't have to worry about running out of Mana due to the siphoning of the magic circle meant to be used to summon Saber, another way to prevent her arrival other then the makeshift Workshop being sealed and locked up. While he would miss his old friend, the Counter Guardian couldn't risk all his work going to waste; the King of Knights did have a nasty habit of attacking first before asking any questions no matter who it was.

"All that would matter is that someone else would end up summoning Saber. It's not too late for the command seal to show up on another unsuspecting Master to be, he had already confirmed in the bath that Shirou's was starting to form too.

Bazett was still dead in this timeline, Sakura was kidnapped and given back to her sister, Rin summoned him and was given a stolen 'Dog', Caster hadn't been summoned yet, Illya was still a major problem, and the others have yet to be summoned. He kept a stern look on his face, although it was slowly starting to slip into an nefarious smirk at the plan coming together. It wouldn't do to get so cocky when the first phase was just starting, double-checking and even triple-checking in a near meticulous fashion before fatigue hit him once more.

Entering his own room, Archer shook his head tiredly from leaving the futon out and ready for himself and opted to sleep with his casual clothes on when crawling under the covers. The dart had enough to keep Shirou asleep through the entire night, but it was better to be safe than sorry if the redhead woke up too early (they were both always morning people, so it wouldn't be a surprise)

Closing his eyes, for once it wasn't plagued with a world of unlimited blades...

Xx-Determination-xX

Reviews!

: That's the funny thing, Archer isn't using the 5th magic at all! Shirou is still a teenager, but is being forced by Archer to wear diapers, dress in clothes more suited to toddlers, and act like a child. He still has the body and mind of how he was before.

Bonus fact: 157 centimeters converted into feet is 5 feet, 2 inches. Which is canonically Shirou's height.

Stoiche: That is true, but like I answered idea's question, Shirou is a 17 year old forced to dress and act like a toddler. While it would be easier to turn him into a child, it would cause too much suspicion if there was a kid that looked and acted like Shirou in his house when he's supposed to be on "Vacation". As for the magically aware, Projection +Hades's Cap (Prisma Illya) + Alteration = Ability to hide Shirou and Archer's presence. Most likely the only person to be able to fully sense them would be Gilgamesh, but he's too busy waiting for Saber's return and travelling around the world.

True Heem: -Takumi laugh- Sorry, but Arthuria isn't gonna be bursting out anytime soon, unless Illya decides to summon her (which won't happen since she has Berserker).

HolyMage Mouto: I'm glad you enjoy it! Though I'm sorry that the update times are as elusive as Lancelot taking off his armor.

Now due to the fact that there has been numerous FAQs about Shirou being turned into a baby, I am going to answer them and then reference it as per this chapter.

Infantilism - The Psychology definition states that it is the persistence of infantile characteristics or behavior in adult life. It is also known as Paraphilic Infantilism and is the desire to wear diapers or fantasies to return to infancy. In this fanfiction, the return is non-consensual and is used as a tactic to force dependency on Shirou Emiya through Archer so that he can not become a 'Hero of Justice'.

ABDL: Short for Adult Baby Diaper Lover, it is a rare fetish that involves Roleplaying the regression of your partner by acting like a infant, wearing diapers, and drinking from bottles. However this is used as a reference in this fanfiction and is not being used as a fetishised setting here.

Hopefully this clears up any misunderstandings that Shirou has been turned into a child! (Damn, this is supposed to be a humorous fanfic and yet I'm talking about forced dependency and non-consensual Infantilism. This was just supposed to be a joke about a Daddy kink-)


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